Google Date

Google is play on the term Googol , a mathematical term coined by Milton Sirotta, for a 1 followed by 100 zeros and popularized in the book, “Mathematics and the Imagination” by Kasner and James Newman. The founders of Google use the world to reflect the company’s mission to organize the immense amount of information available on the web.  The term also seem appropriate for a single women  as sometimes she must  date 100 zeros to find her hero… that is “IF” she (not me) is looking for one.  As I am a firm believer of the law of averages aka if you kiss enough frogs  you will eventual hit a prince, unfortunately most women toss in the dating towel after only a ribbit, ribbit or two, instead of allow their “imagination” to enjoy the “mathematics” .  Google is also suitor #3

The Google story starts at Disco Room26 in the EUR (Esposizione Universale Roma) a residential and business zone in south Rome.   My friend Tammy that had moved from the United States to Rome last year had fallen in love with a wealth Sicilian during her summer vacation to Sicily and was having her last night out with the girls before moving to the island.   The plan was for all the ladies to arrive in time to take advance of the “ladies Free before 1am” entry.  Of course at 1am I am still at home.  I receive at text from Tammy to bring my “Diva a Game “because the lines to enter were long and the ladies free time was over.  The entry price is now $20.  WHAT! I do not pay to enter clubs… especially in Rome.  I immediately changed from flat boots to 5 inch heel, to impress or intimate.

During my cab ride to the club the driver watched me in the rear view mirror.  Oh boy here we go!  As I looked out the side window, he turned up his radio. GOOD he is entertaining himself, I thought to myself.

Then I heard humming that turned into full blown singing.  I said nothing and start looking for a hidden camera.   As we neared the club he asked if I knew the song “The way you look tonight”.   I replied yes, that I love the song and Frank Sinatra.   As I stepped out of the cab, he told me that I was beautiful and I made him think of that song because it was perfect for me.  I smiled and said Thank you.  Ahhh…Roma!

The lines were as Tammy texted, long and full of women.   I KNEW not to go anywhere near one of the lines, as one that is accustomed to special treatment would NEVER do such a thing.   I looked around for the bottle service/VIP entrance.   It is normally the shortest line.  I walk over like I owned the place. “Hello, I am a guest of Alessandro (there is always one on the list)” I said with major confidence.  “Alessandro Buassi”, he asks.  “Yes, has he already arrived” ” Yes, he is here, please follow me”  I walk with the doorman, planning my next move… what am I going to say to Alessandro Buassi who I have never met in my life.

The club is packed; this will work to my advantage as it will give me some time to think as we maneuver the crowd.  I am texting Tammy for her location in the room. While looking for her reply, I notice a hottie to my right.  I shoot him a smile and her smiles back.  I wave and her wave back.  Then I stop, the doorman stops also. “Oh, there is Alessandro’s friend. I’m okay, thank you” I say while walking in the direction of the waving hand.   The doorman turns and walks back towards his post.  Wow…that was a close one.  Trust me; I had a back-up plan had we made it to Alessandro.  But, for now plan B will be save for another day.

The hottie does not speak English, thank goodness as I need to keep it moving and find my friends.  Tammy and the girls are now on the dance floor gettin’ it to Donna Summers’ “Bad Girl”.  After a few dances with the girls I get bored and ask my friend Karen from London if she wanted to walk around the room to check out the stock (men).  Karen is game but wants to stop at the bar for a drink first.   While she is ordering, at least four men walk up trying to take a shot at us.  It crazy, you turn your back to one and there is another one waiting.

We are having a ball exchanging numbers but I forget to code my phone entries.  You should know that there seem to only be a few Italian first names used Italy.  The reason is most babies are named after saints. Those named after saints actual celebrate two birthdays, their actual birthday and their saint’s birthday. As heartwarming as this is, it can a major challenge when meeting new guys.  It is not unusual to meet two or three men name Marco, Luca, Carlo, Alessandro, or Francesso in one night. Last name are important, so is trying to attach the correct face with a name and telephone number, something I have not mastered.   I remember having a planned date one evening while traveling to Rome with my friend Veronica in 2009.  While getting dress for my date, she asked which one of my admires had called for the date.   I replied, “I don’t have a clue! I am just going downstairs and see who shows up first.   It is 2012 and I have not gotten any better at coding them in my phone.

The heat from the packed club becomes unbearable and we step outside for some cool air.   Right outside the door a tall (about 6’4) drink of water grabs my hand and motions for a dance.   He is so cute, I forget that I am hot and follow him back into the sweat-box.   We dance and talked, he knows a little English and is quite funny.   He says his name (which I immediately forgot … yes I have issues) and asked for my phone number right around this time Karen has found me and it is time to continue our walk around the club.

By the time we leave the party, I have given my number count to four candidates … I think!   Remember, I am a girl that believes in the law of averages.  The more people I meet, the better the odds of meeting someone interesting.

The next day, I receive a call and the name Albrecio shows on the display.   I am in a meeting can cannot take the call.  The call is followed by a text message “this is Albrecio, I just called you”.  Now my rule is “first contact” must be a phone call, a man cannot text me initially.  It is part of the training program on how to treat me.  Since Albrecio’s call was rejected, I responded to the text with a simple “hello”.

The next text in perfect English explained that we have met last night and he wanted to take me out for on a date the next day.  I had plan for the next two nights (Baby Food and The hound) and suggest Monday after work for dinner.  He agreed.

For the next two days he sent funny messages AND PICTURES of himself.  Oh this is the hottie with the crazy sense of humor, I thought to myself. He not as cute in his pictures but I am still looking forward to seeing him again. More pictures are sent by text.  Ok, this is getting a bit strange.  What man sends this many unrequested photos.  A bit crazy but I am enjoying our conversations.

The night of our date, I receive a text “I am here”.  I am dressed casual cute.  You know, hot but look like not much effort was put into it because this is how you look every date.  My effortless took an hour and a half.   I also pull out the 5 inch heels.  This is a special night.

I walk out the building and Albercio is standing across the street waving.   As he walks toward me, my eyes focus… DAMN this is the wrong guy.  He in not bad looking, just not the one I was expecting.   Maybe this is why he did not look the same in his pictures. lol  I try not to look disappointed.  Hey, it is not his fault I don’t have a good phone coding system for the men I meet. Albercio looks excited to see me and starts talking in Italian.  I smile and say “sorry, I don’t speak Italian and wait on him to reply in English.  Well not only is this NOT the right guy, he does not speak ANY English.  How can this be?  We were having amazing conversation on the WhatsApp instant messager.  I am thinking, this is a joke, come on where is the really Albercio.

As I am trying to process this turn of events, the much shorter impostor pulls out his phone and starts hitting the keys.   Okay he is calling Albercio; I am going to kill him for pulling this joke on me.  I start laughing and looking around.  Then in perfect English the impostor asked “where would you like to eat?”  My reply, “I am not sure, let’s wait for Albercio.  The looks at confused and say “non capisco inglese (I don’t understand English)”.  I laugh thinking it is a joke, then he hands me his phone.

I think, Ooooh all this is a joke and Albercio  is on the phone. I take the phone and the Google translator is open.    Now, I understand, he wants me to reply using the translator.  I type, “where is Albercio?” translator displays “Dove Albercio”,  he replies, yep you guessed it “io sono Albrecio (I am Albrecio).

Again I try not to look surprised and attempt to play my question off as a joke.  He smiles and starts typing on the phone again.  Once again he speaks in prefect English, “would you like to eat near here”.  All I could say was “si”.

We started walking down the street looking for a restaurant.  Needed someone to help me out, said Compo Di Flori which was near by and where my friend Carlo has a restaurant.   Albercio now known as Google, repeats Compo Di Flori?  Si Si, I say.   As we are walking towards Sensus, I am laugh at myself, at Albercio and the crazy date we are on.

We arrive at Sensus and Carol gives me my favorite table. Carlo and Albrecio start talking in Italian, followed by Carlo talking to me in English.  He bring us menus, one in English and one it Italian.  I start telling Carlo about the night I am having.  I am not concerned about telling it in-front of Google, because … well… he does not speak English.   For all I know, he could have done the same thing in Italian.


We order our meal and Albrecio try to start a conversation in English.  After three words, he is stuck and pulls out his phone.  He asked did I like him.  Interesting question for a first date, especially by Google translator.  The question seem a bit needy but it does explain all the texted photos.   He is seeking my approval… by Google translator.  This is going to be an interesting night.  I pull out my phone.

For the next two hours our date is by Google translator.  The only rule is we must  read the translation aloud and not simply show it to each other the translation.  This help to make the translations more personal as we interjected our personalities into the readings.  Carlo walks by a few times shaking his head.   About and hour in, it actually became fun and we did share quite a bit with each other.

We were having so much fun that I agreed to after dinner drinks at a near by pub.   After a while no translation was needed.  We were simply having fun with the few word we knew of the ether’s language and making silly faces.

The evening ending with a walk back to my place and a kiss on the cheek.   I said grazie (thank you) knowing that he knew it was for the fabulous evening.

I learned some valuable lessons that night.

3. I need a system for keeping track of the me I am meeting.

2. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover,  especially if it is in a different language.

1. When we let go of expectations, sometimes some special can happen.

And yes, i am planning to see Albercio again. I know have two translators loaded on my phone. :)Thank you for read! This is my last entry before returning to Rome tomorrow. Everyone one should be caught up and ready to follow me “A Black Girl in Italy” on my next adventure.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *